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Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: MaxaLisa] #351077
07/29/19 03:16 AM
07/29/19 03:16 AM
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Shilohsmom Online content OP
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Originally Posted by MaxaLisa
Originally Posted by Shilohsmom
I hear you loud and clear. Every time I come here I end up sobbing over Eli...



It is precisely those on this board that understand the loss. We have had a lot of significant loss over the past years. It's good to see new dogs/pups and their adventures, but it's also really hard to come here after losing so much. I actually think that being able to interact with this site is part of the working through the loss, an important part. Sometimes it hurts too much to do it, but we get stronger, and sometimes that new pup gives us that extra push.


I couldn't agree with you more Lisa
hugging

This is the exact place that I know I can go who understands about the loss of one of my pets. Not only does everyone understand about the loss, but we've watched each others dogs grow up. We get to know about each others dogs and we care about each others dogs.

I don't hesitate to comment on my Eli thread. As I've written his loss feels the hardest, but it could be that it wasn't that long ago that he passed. I'm sure there will be many more days that I come here, starting writing and end up just closing it and leaving as I'm crying too much. But the important thing is most of the time I come here and am just fine. I too think the process makes us stronger.


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351078
07/29/19 04:18 AM
07/29/19 04:18 AM
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 1,357
NE Ohio
Selzer Offline
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I cleaned my bathroom yesterday and gave two of the three Quinnie toys that were on the floor to Cujo, Hepsi, and Kaiah, and to Karma and Uzzi, then I found another to give to Karma and Uzzi, thinking I have to start letting the others have her toys. I went and got dog food today and bought a blue elephant and made it squeak and hugged it all the way home. I gave it to Tinny.

Just because you have many, doesn't mean you don't love them like crazy. In some ways, it makes it a little easier to have another dog or more dogs, because they make you get up, they make you feed them and care for them. And eventually, they make you laugh again.


Geriatric: Heidi
Seniors: Odessa, Joy
Mature Adults: Bear, Hepzibah
Adults: Karma, Cujo 2
Young Adults: Ramona, Kojak
Puppies: Tinuviel, Uzzi, and Kaiah

Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351083
07/29/19 03:15 PM
07/29/19 03:15 PM
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Mary Jane Offline
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It's been 16 months and I still can't write about losing Mars. Of course, Miss Nova, AKA Dog Princess, is a furry healing device-but one dog does not equal another. No way.

Each of us just does the best we can. Personally, I am really really glad to know you all understand from your own experience or just your good hearts.

MJ

Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351085
07/29/19 03:29 PM
07/29/19 03:29 PM
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Mary Jane Offline
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I don't mean to highjack the thread but my post may be misleading.

I adore Nova. Mars was really David's dog despite being as good as gold to me. I just can't write about Mars' death.

MJ

Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Mary Jane] #351088
07/29/19 06:31 PM
07/29/19 06:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Mary Jane
I don't mean to highjack the thread but my post may be misleading.

I adore Nova. Mars was really David's dog despite being as good as gold to me. I just can't write about Mars' death.

MJ


Write all you want. It sucks loosing these cherished life's. And while each pup is different, they are each so very precious in their own way.


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351158
08/11/19 07:20 PM
08/11/19 07:20 PM
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Central NJ
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I was cleaning the guest room closet and found toys I had put away to give Gracie on her coming home day anniversary - we celebrate both her birthday and the day we brought her home. She got to celebrate her 13th birthday with new toys but we missed her coming home anniversary as she died one month prior.

It's so darned hard. I am having so much trouble getting used to the new normal. We fostered a wonderful dog for a military member for a month but I cannot even imagine bringing another dog in.

Hugs to everyone.


Jen, proudly owned by Gracie, my heart & soul, my best friend

Gracie
DOB 1/19/06
into our hearts 3/19/06
her last breath 2/21/2019

Accomplishments: CGC, TD, TT, PT
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: GraciesMommy] #351161
08/12/19 05:48 PM
08/12/19 05:48 PM
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Mary Jane Offline
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Originally Posted by GraciesMommy


It's so darned hard. .... I cannot even imagine bringing another dog in.
.


It is hard and we have to cope the best way we can. I think it's great that you fostered a dog for a service person. I'm kind of old (68) and I've lost a lot of people and people with tails. I'm not sure I will ever get over some of those losses.

Take care of yourself. I hope you can foster some other dog sometime-it's a real kindness for the whole community.

MJ

Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: GraciesMommy] #351162
08/13/19 03:20 PM
08/13/19 03:20 PM
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 19,613
Northern CA
MaxaLisa Offline

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Originally Posted by GraciesMommy

It's so darned hard. I am having so much trouble getting used to the new normal. We fostered a wonderful dog for a military member for a month but I cannot even imagine bringing another dog in.


I lasted 3 months without a dog and realized I was just sinking without one here. Maybe it helps that I went with a small dog. To be truthful, I though of jazz rescuing me at that point more than me rescuing her.

I know a number of people who just couldn't do the dog thing anymore after such a significant loss. I get it. When I first got jazz, all I could think of is how bad it will be when I lose her.


MaxaL (aka LisaT)

Jazmine, mini-mix, 10/18/2011
Max-n-Indy
Max, 5/2001-2/2012, RIP my partner, my Regal Boy
Indy, 5/1997-10/2010, RIP my friend, my teacher

Health Index
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Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351163
08/13/19 09:33 PM
08/13/19 09:33 PM
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Here, it depends. When three dogs loose one to become two, when two dogs loose one to become one dog --- it is usually an opportunity to focus on the survivor(s). Sometimes, though, I have to have another dog. Sometimes the surviving dog demands another dog. Sometimes I get a push to take a second dog. Sometimes it is just that it seems the dog needs a home and their other alternative isn't good. Yes, to all of those situations. When one dog looses one so that there are no dogs in the house --- that just doesn't last long for me. In a way I see it as homage to previous dogs - recognizing how much they have meant to me so that I cannot be without a dog.

I don't know that there is any one path that's better than another. It's you and what works right then.

Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: GraciesMommy] #351164
08/15/19 03:40 AM
08/15/19 03:40 AM
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Originally Posted by GraciesMommy
I was cleaning the guest room closet and found toys I had put away to give Gracie on her coming home day anniversary - we celebrate both her birthday and the day we brought her home. She got to celebrate her 13th birthday with new toys but we missed her coming home anniversary as she died one month prior.

It's so darned hard. I am having so much trouble getting used to the new normal. We fostered a wonderful dog for a military member for a month but I cannot even imagine bringing another dog in.

Hugs to everyone.


Oh how I hated that part. I lost both Shiloh and Shoshi in December but as many of you may recall, I do all my holiday shopping early. By December everything is wrapped and ready. Both times I had to go through the MANY presents and change the name tag. Just the worst feeling. I kept one of Shoshi's toys. It was from her favorite line of toys. I might pass it on to Sashi some day, we will see. Yes, you'll notice a similar nick name, it's amazing how that worked out
cool


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Mary Jane] #351165
08/15/19 03:43 AM
08/15/19 03:43 AM
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Originally Posted by Mary Jane
Originally Posted by GraciesMommy


It's so darned hard. .... I cannot even imagine bringing another dog in.
.


It is hard and we have to cope the best way we can. I think it's great that you fostered a dog for a service person. I'm kind of old (68) and I've lost a lot of people and people with tails. I'm not sure I will ever get over some of those losses.

Take care of yourself. I hope you can foster some other dog sometime-it's a real kindness for the whole community.

MJ


Unfortunately, loss hurts and there's no limit on how long it will hurt and how bad that pain.


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: MaxaLisa] #351166
08/15/19 03:46 AM
08/15/19 03:46 AM
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Originally Posted by MaxaLisa
Originally Posted by GraciesMommy

It's so darned hard. I am having so much trouble getting used to the new normal. We fostered a wonderful dog for a military member for a month but I cannot even imagine bringing another dog in.


I lasted 3 months without a dog and realized I was just sinking without one here. Maybe it helps that I went with a small dog. To be truthful, I though of jazz rescuing me at that point more than me rescuing her.

I know a number of people who just couldn't do the dog thing anymore after such a significant loss. I get it. When I first got jazz, all I could think of is how bad it will be when I lose her.


I'm so very happy you have Jazz. Dog's no matter what breed, are wonderful. Like people, no two are the same, But they all have so much to offer if we just open our hearts to them.


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: middleofnowhere] #351167
08/15/19 03:49 AM
08/15/19 03:49 AM
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Originally Posted by middleofnowhere
Here, it depends. When three dogs loose one to become two, when two dogs loose one to become one dog --- it is usually an opportunity to focus on the survivor(s). Sometimes, though, I have to have another dog. Sometimes the surviving dog demands another dog. Sometimes I get a push to take a second dog. Sometimes it is just that it seems the dog needs a home and their other alternative isn't good. Yes, to all of those situations. When one dog looses one so that there are no dogs in the house --- that just doesn't last long for me. In a way I see it as homage to previous dogs - recognizing how much they have meant to me so that I cannot be without a dog.

I don't know that there is any one path that's better than another. It's you and what works right then.


I can't be without a second dog, just in case I were to loose one. I just couldn't handle being alone. I know that. I would just fall apart.


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351168
08/15/19 04:27 AM
08/15/19 04:27 AM
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Like I was mentioning above, I could never be alone without a dog. The thought alone is just too much for me. That's one reason I have a second dog. Of course, there are many reasons I have a second dog, but that's one of them.

I have three stars that I look to for each of my pups. There's a Shiloh's star, a Shoshi's star and a Eli's star. Some times I'll sit outside and talk to them. I had actually showed the pups the stars while they were alive. I explained to them that when they went on to Heaven and I wanted to talk to them that I would do so through whichever star it was. I needed to also let them know if anything were to happen to me and they were to miss me, all they had to do was look at that star and know I was watching over them,

Now I'm sobbing.... The thing is when we love something as deeply as we do our dogs, our souls are shattered with their loss. And why wouldn't they be? These are lifes we bring into our home and our hearts. We love them, we take care of them day in and day out, We train them and are so proud of them when they learn. When they are sick, we are sick with worry. All of us have done all nighters with a sick dog.or called in sick from your job because your dog is sick and you'd rather be with them. All this stuff and so much more. In return they give us what no human can, unconditional love. Oh how that feels so good. To them we are always the most important person in the world.

My point is, I don't understand why we should expect ourselves to recovery so quickly? If someone lost a child, you sure wouldn't be hard on them in six months if they haven't 'recovered yet'. These losses we suffer are just about as great. I get it, they are not children but they are like children for many of us. And we do all the same things parents do. They are such a huge part of our life's and to loss that its going to hurt for an awful long time. I don't get why we think we should be 'over it' in such a short time.


Rosa

Proud Mom to Kody and Sasha
and never to be forgotten, Shiloh, Shoshi and Eli
Every dog deserves to have a human that thinks its the greatest dog that ever lived!
Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: Shilohsmom] #351178
08/16/19 09:36 PM
08/16/19 09:36 PM
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 19,613
Northern CA
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Originally Posted by Shilohsmom
I'm so very happy you have Jazz. Dog's no matter what breed, are wonderful. Like people, no two are the same, But they all have so much to offer if we just open our hearts to them.


Thanks! Me too wub


MaxaL (aka LisaT)

Jazmine, mini-mix, 10/18/2011
Max-n-Indy
Max, 5/2001-2/2012, RIP my partner, my Regal Boy
Indy, 5/1997-10/2010, RIP my friend, my teacher

Health Index
K9 TBD info and Tick List Links
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Re: My Dearest Eli [Re: middleofnowhere] #351179
08/16/19 09:39 PM
08/16/19 09:39 PM
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 19,613
Northern CA
MaxaLisa Offline

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Originally Posted by middleofnowhere
Here, it depends. When three dogs loose one to become two, when two dogs loose one to become one dog --- it is usually an opportunity to focus on the survivor(s). Sometimes, though, I have to have another dog. Sometimes the surviving dog demands another dog. Sometimes I get a push to take a second dog. Sometimes it is just that it seems the dog needs a home and their other alternative isn't good. Yes, to all of those situations. When one dog looses one so that there are no dogs in the house --- that just doesn't last long for me. In a way I see it as homage to previous dogs - recognizing how much they have meant to me so that I cannot be without a dog.

I don't know that there is any one path that's better than another. It's you and what works right then.


Agree about the different paths.

When Indy left, I am pretty sure max enjoyed being the only dog and having me to himself. Of course, as he became unwell, I couldn't have handled more than one dog at that time.

I think about a second dog with jazz, but she has so many issues and is so expensive to care for. She gets LOTS of dog dog interaction, so I think this works for us for now.


MaxaL (aka LisaT)

Jazmine, mini-mix, 10/18/2011
Max-n-Indy
Max, 5/2001-2/2012, RIP my partner, my Regal Boy
Indy, 5/1997-10/2010, RIP my friend, my teacher

Health Index
K9 TBD info and Tick List Links
http://www.rabieschallengefund.org/
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